Look Within- A Brand New Year to Fall in Love with Life

"When you give thanks for what you already have, the corresponding manifestation is to expand and increase what you have. When you give thanks for what you don't have, as if you already had it, the corresponding manifestation is to attract and create it into your life." -Mike Dooley

 

Ram Dass died December 22, 2019. He was one of my teachers. He had a near-fatal stroke over 20 years ago that paralyzed him and hampered his speaking ability. It took away his freedom in his body, but it allowed him to become more compassionate and humble. He continued to reach deeper into his soul and allowed and received his God image as he shared love till his last breath.

He says in Be Here Now, one of his books and for me, a favorite,"Early in the journey you wonder how long the journey will take and whether you will make it in this lifetime. Later you will see that where you are going is HERE and you will arrive NOW... so you stop asking."His teachings, and through his living, he demonstrated that every situation in life is for God to use to do good. In his later years, he focused on aging and dying without fear.

Doors close all the time. Doors open all the time. Life presents us with one opportunity after another. And when you look at your cup as half full instead of half empty, you might see ten thousand ways to walk through these openings. Life brings all kinds of loss in different ways. As we work our way down life's path, gratitude helps to soften the blows and lighten the load of the burdens carried; even when we stumble and fall and as broken dreams stop us in our tracks.

            

All of life is sacred. When you can accept it, just as it is, you open a space to find the good in it. Through moments of contemplation and meditation, I can become so anchored inside my inner being that when the feeling of fear rises-up in the present moment, I can see where my mind is attached and then I can let it pass on by, just like the weather. It's the grasping that creates suffering. When I recognize what I am attached to, I can free myself from even the most difficult situations. How easy it is to let the negative mind get into a loop that keeps us stuck in the fear of what is instead of participating in the flow of life. The soul just accepts it without pushing it away.

            

The first step is to express these indwelling thoughts of negativity whatever way it works for you and to decide to feel good by being grateful in this present moment. Think of gratitude as a present that gets unwrapped the moment it is given. It's time to start living your dreams now as you fall in love with yourself and your life. 

Wishing you all a Happy New Year!

Namasté,

Frannie

Let Us Be Grateful for Our Precious Life

"Tell me, what do you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" -Mary Oliver 

 

Life is so very precious! I just spent time away in California to celebrate my grandson Theo's 1^stbirthday. How easy it is to be with him as I pause and become more present. He brings me into my heart without effort. I sit watching him. His big blue eyes and infectious laugh pulls me deeply inside where I let go of everything I think I need to do and just settle into the moment. Here in the living room I feel happy as a wave of peace enters me. I watch Theo try to walk, stumble, fall, cry, laugh and get up again and again.

 

As I ask myself how I choose to live my life right now, I breathe in and sit quietly. I meditate on the love, compassion and truth that is deeply inside of me now. With every heartbreak and unexpected experience that lifts my heart into joy, I can take a step into living what is next. Here I arrive, humbled to remember that in every moment, even if I stumble or fall, I have a choice to play, to sing, to open my eyes and feel the beauty of life that flows through. In this silence, everything that I need to know is revealed. 

What will I do with this one wild and precious life? 

Today, I settle into my heart and acknowledge how beautiful my family and friends are. Each one of you are like shining jewels in my life who have blessed my heart with kindness and sweet presence. When I stand in the sacred space that surrounds me, each breath and each touch, I will be mindful of all the details of my life and give thanks.

Step by step, moment by moment, breath by breath, 

I sense a quiet that embraces everything. 

I am the center of it all where everything is still.

I cannot find myself in those things of the world.

I pay attention to the language of Spirit.

I listen to the sweet sound of nothing.

This silence waits for me in between the words and ideas of my mind. 

My heart beats in this sacred place within my inner being. 

I can feel the touch of love that enters when I stay with me.

I surrender to this path that shines the light onto everything I do.

 

Namasté,

Frannie

Change as the All-Knowing Eye

Beauty and Love are as body and soul

Inexhaustible mine, and diamond- beyond price.

I loved his beauty and Love flamed from me.

I grew beautiful, Love whispered my name.

                                                                        -Rumi

 

We go along in our lives, one step at a time, one day at a time until, without warning, life takes a turn. It feels like a sudden slap in the face, or bonk on the head, or a subtle trembling deep inside that you can't put your finger on. You couldn't see it even if you had been warned because you trusted in the unfolding of your life so completely; trusted that in each moment you were taken care of. You couldn't receive it because it wasn't the time. This is the time; now is the time to open your eyes and your heart to the truth.

 

This moment, like a storm that comes out of nowhere on a perfectly sunny day, offers the opportunity to be grateful that you breathed into the warmth of the sun while it was there; that you could receive all it had to offer until it wasn't there anymore. Life happens and it doesn't always leave a good taste in your mouth. Sometimes the lingering blow, the change, the death of what was, shatters the illusions. Once broken, these illusions can dissolve and the clearing begins. The mind, so eager to give its opinions, its defenses, its logic, its story, begins to shout so loud until you surrender and let it all go. When you choose to move past the noise and insanity of the mind, you find the door to stillness. Here the quiet of the moment offers you a breath of fresh air. As you take it in, the space inside begins to soften its hold on the past and what was.      

 

I sit inside myself in the sweet aftermath of such a storm. As the light shines through the blinds in the kitchen, I take the bowl of soup and place it in front of me. The taste, the smell, the feel of this food, nurtures me. It is simply the moment giving to me the truth of what is, right here.

 

I feel my broken heart as I touch the profound feelings that are so raw inside. This ache draws me back into myself. Even though there is pain, I can meet it with compassion as I forgive myself and another for all the hurts experienced and caused. We are all human. Sometimes we miss the mark, other times we downright fail. Though we truly aren't perfect, we are all worthy to be loved and forgiven. In this moment, forgiveness is letting go of what was so that the ending can be a new beginning. This dark night of my soul lights my path back to this sacred journey of self-love.

 

No one is responsible for our happiness. If we allow ourselves to be dependent on anything or anyone in this way, it can turn into deep sorrow, shame, or regret. Within the arena of our own weakness, our intolerable guilt prevents us from taking responsibility. It obstructs our ability to see and to face our fears. When we become fearful, we can run or we can face the darkness and rise up. Blaming another for our pain takes us away from the truth that can set us free. We aren't here to be saved, nor are we here to save anyone. Every part of our humanness is part of the wholeness that is humanity. Accepting it all is easier said than done yet taking personal responsibility is necessary. Meeting yourself here is where true power lives.

Real happiness cannot be taken away by our darkness. The space within our heart is so vast, even more vast than the ever-changing sky. It is here that the incredible feelings of our unlovable and imperfect self are accepted and held in this presence. Everything is worthy to be here, and when we learn the lesson that our self-worth is not attached to another but is a part of this infinite love that is Divine, our heart will be broken wide open to allow rebirth into new life. As Franz Kafka says, "Everything you love, you will eventually lose, but in the end, love will return in a different form."

 

Change is constant, like the changing of seasons. Everything is temporary - people come in and out of our lives, the body has its ups and downs, the mind becomes obsessive and quiet, this world has calm waters and in the next moment, a Hurricane comes around the corner. Yet here, in the center of change is the all-knowing eye that sees with the heart that remembers that change can be beautiful!

Living Awake, Moment by Moment

"You are the sky. Everything else- it's the weather." - Pema Chodron

 

            Sometimes, in a heartbeat, our lives can turn upside down. Change can enter like a tornado bringing us the struggles and challenges that can humble us and move us to fall on our knees, asking for help.

            I found myself filled with emotion the other night when I woke up and walked into the living room in the darkness of the night. The intense feeling, like a tsunami came pushing through me as I fell on the couch, crying uncontrollable tears. The suffering of our humanity is pushing on my heart as I hold myself in this release. How grateful I am to empty this heart of mine that called me to surrender once again. Letting the tears flow, the crying just knows what to do. Empty of these feelings, I rest in this space where I become full of a peace that is truly beyond my own understanding. My emptiness brings calmness to every part of me. I rest on the couch in the early morning dawn, knowing that the suffering of our world is felt within. I am surrendered. Nothing to control. Why do I ever think that control would ever set me free? My past losses showed me how to be fully alive. I do not want to ever throw away the chances to love now.

            Life itself seems to humble me again and again as it moves me to my inner-life. Without love or compassion or even truth, it does not matter if I have all the needs of my physical life met and comforts of my daily living all in tack. If my love light is dim and I'm waiting for money in the bank to take care of myself, I realize that the generosity of love and compassion is all that is needed to keep me fully alive. And then "I go out and make the donuts." Being a counselor is my career but loving compassion is my purpose. It comes from my own inner focus to hold myself just where I am, flawed and fabulous. In this acceptance of my inner self, I can be conscious as I breathe. The veils seem to lift where I am awake. It is here in God's mind where I am fully free. The attachments to this world will never make me truly happy.

            I remember the feeling I had, lying beside my 4-month-old grandson as he looked right into my eyes. He touched my face and pulled me closer as I kissed his cheek. He begins to laugh the way when you are tickled, and you can't stop it if you tried. It's contagious. I laughed with him and he looked deeply into my eyes with a sparkle that lights up my heart. It's as if I can see the whole world through his gaze. Pure joy filled the moment as his whole-body giggled. Now, just thinking about it, the feeling of happiness softens the sadness, despair or depression that ever was. All the fears and worries wash away. It seems to dissolve any toxic emotion or anxiety and there is a deep connection to real- life right here, right now. No medicine is better than laughing from the belly and little Theo brings me to it so naturally. 

            My friend David Sears let go into the Divine presence, Feb. 8^th, 2019, in the early morning. His focus was on the life that continues beyond the body, the transition into the sweetest embrace of Spirit. In his last days, he welcomed death as he welcomed you into his breath. Even though his body was filled with cancer, he said, "it is all wonderful!" I witnessed him as he let his heart wrap around the mystery as if he was having a love affair with his own transition. His commitment to conscious dying brought me into conscious living.

            I sit at the restaurant with my friend and my dog as I watch a little bird coming up to Mollie as she plays with this new friend. A little bird, so joyously hopping around like hide and seek. I feel inside my heart, it's David, my friend, my teacher of living life in love till his transition. "Be happy, be happy- it's wonderful! I hear it inside my mind. If he could, he would shine his spirit through this world to say hi. He loved my Mollie so much that he went out and got his puppy, Sweet Pea.

            David was living awake moment by moment before he slipped out of his body. He modeled for me that I have the choice to let go each day of the attachments to this world of form. To live in the presence of the Divine is like sinking into the deepest ocean of well- being. Here is where we are called to be.

            Happiness is our birthright. When we are in harmony inside, independent of the chaotic conditions outside, truly our minds have let go of interpreting the experience. We just begin to move into the flow of life as it is. The grieving heart takes a break; we make a choice to take off the heavy garments of sadness and sorrow and look in the eyes of this world like a beautiful spring day calling us forth to play. We let go and surrender to the moment at hand where we can walk into a new state of being and in the meantime just get outside and go for a walk.           

          I am deeply guided as my inward focus brings me into my intuitive nature where I embrace it all. It's more than just understanding it with my head. My heart feels the experience of living fully. I look up at the clear blue sky as a new world inside of me is being created.

 

Be awake as you reach into what is here.

Let go and be love now.

 

Blessings and Love, 

Frannie

New Life

On this day when all you can feel is the breath of love

She believed she could and so she did

Time stands still, as I watch my daughter give birth

She is a Warrior Mama with strength and courage to bring him forth

This Divine Miracle with Father calm by her side

I stand in your presence, little one

I see your face 

As you come into the world

My tears are flowing as the love gushes 

You are the light of my heart

I am in love

 

A bird is screeching. I am pulled out of where I am, listening to its message. I hear him announcing the arrival of this baby boy. I hear the excitement of nature singing her praises of this day. Such a beautiful opportunity to renew our sense of the sacred. There is so much innocence and beauty to be born as I gently move my attention to my heart. I am not missing a thing! Each day, hour by hour, moment by moment, here with my daughter Lane and her husband Rob, is a blessing.

             

It's quite the day! The sun beating down on our bodies as the waves crash towards the shoreline. The birds soaring over the mountain top. I watch and listen to nature being itself. Always the healer and giving me the peace that is beyond all understanding. 

             

My daughter is ready to give birth any day! We sit at the beach as she reads her journal pages to me. She started writing to Theo (baby in utero) since the beginning of this pregnancy. These beautiful words and thoughts she reads to Rob and I, are her inner most feelings about this journey she is on, bringing this precious child into the world. 

             

Another day comes and goes. It's already 10 days after his due date. Choosing to take joy in, I watch Lane move to the music as if she were on a stage, moving her body like a ballerina. The music seems to infuse strength into her limbs and every movement is effortless. Dancing to the songs that feed her soul as every motion is the expression of her deep love for her unborn child. Rob is filming this sacred dance as my eyes fill up with tears. So, cherished are these intimate moments before the birth. It's such a mystery to know when he will arrive. 

             

In the wee hours of the dawn, still dark outside, I wake up remembering my dream. My deceased husband Steve visited. In the dream, Lane is sitting in front of Steve. He is not speaking but his body language shows his excitement. Light illuminates his presence. She bends over to him and kisses his lips and a card, all folded up passes from his lips to hers. She takes the card and unfolds it very slowly, like it is a treasure and it says, "Hi Mama, I can't wait to be in your arms." Spirit speaks the celestial message from beyond.

Another day goes by as we carry on. I go to a yoga class and in the silent place within the pose I honor my urge to check my phone. I see the text from Lane, "my water broke, come home now!" I'm out in a flash and walking quickly down the busy street back to their home, wanting to tell every person passing by that my daughter is about to give birth. I am bursting with joy. The moment has come.

             

At 5:23 am on October 23rd, I witness my daughter giving birth. It was the most beautiful experience of my life. Her courage to move through it all naturally as peace became her mantra on this intimate adventure to motherhood was captivating. Her husband, her rock, speaking words from his heart transporting her to her safe place within. I stand in awe of the miracle of birth as I am aware of the presence that permeates the room. Then I see him. So, tiny with so much strength to come into our world. He is put on Lane's chest as we all cry with his first sound of life. Theo has arrived!

             

A couple of days after his birth, I hold him in my arms. We dance to the music that Theo listened to while he was in Lane's womb. As I gaze into his eyes, I remember this love.

He smiles and those dimples he has are kisses from Steve.

 

I love being his Nannie Frannie...

 

 

Welcome to our world my beautiful grandson, Theo Steven!

 

Namasté, 

Frannie

Rebirth Into Your Fullness

As the months of inner hibernation have helped you to let go of what was, you will now blossom. The fruits of your labor will bring aliveness and delicious parts of you into the world. Your body is the vessel of this infinite life that will continue to give to the world.  - Frannie (from my upcoming book)

Just a few days ago, I sat beside my friend Charlotte, holding her hand as I received her fully. I was taking her in, every part of her. In my heart I knew this might be the last time I get to touch her physical body. Her smiling eyes reflected back the magnificent beauty of her life. I gazed at her every movement and listened to every word and in the silence of my mind, I felt the love of just being in her presence. I wasn't wrapped up in the fear of her dying. I was held in a love that had always been there since the first moment I met her. I looked into her clear eyes and saw her determination to do whatever she needed to do. She was on her last days and her breathing was so labored especially when she took off the oxygen.

 

Charlotte still believed a miracle could happen. She had faith and hope and surrounded by all who loved her, she was learning her greatest life lesson. She said to me, "I am finally learning to receive." Robert was sitting beside me and together we meditated with her and the peace and illumination of light filled us. We were in the womb of God's loving embrace, not knowing the future. She looked at me and said that she wasn't afraid to die only the panic of suffering.

 

Yesterday, I felt her leave. Maybe not her body fully yet. I felt her presence in nature while going for a walk as I spoke to her. She might have been visiting the other-side and checking it all out in the moments of sleep. The energy filled me and tears rolled down my face. Yet the pain of her leaving wasn't choking me. It was filling me up with an incredible love. I knew her children and family were around her. I had a plan to go to see her with Robert the next day, yet deep down inside I felt she was going to leave. I looked at the clock and it was around 6:00 pm. The feeling came back. I knew I wouldn't see her again. Yet, somehow I just didn't want to take that in. I went on cooking and being with myself, not wanting to go anywhere. My thoughts were with Charlotte and in my way, I believed I was with her. I was in a mindful, prayerful place.

 

Then I got the phone call from Robert, "Charlotte passed, surrounded by her family around 6:00 pm." As the tears flowed from my eyes, I was grateful she did not suffer. I cried as the tears opened me up. I cried because I won't be able to go and have that luncheon date we planned. I cried because I won't hear her laugh and hear the words of wisdom that would spill out of her. I cried because I loved her and in my short time on this earth with her, I knew she was a real friend. She was herself and shared her heart so easily. She wasn't afraid to engage in any conversation. It was intimate to be with someone like that and the quality of time with her was a lifetime of truth.

 

This woman was Robert's best friend and she was the one who brought us together. She was the one who sat beside him the first time he saw me. Charlotte was an angel here on this earth. She was an inspiration to many and just looking at her, you didn't see all she accomplished in helping serve our world. She was a doer. When her daughter died 20 years ago, she allowed life to move her into creating a foundation to send children to camp. Meeting her, you fell in love with yourself because she was pure love.

 

We leave our imprint on this earth. Just like if we laid upon the sand, there our form would be. Just like walking on the beach, our footprints would remain. Just like a flower blooming, it's fragrance would be left for us to take in. Just like the hug from a friend or a handshake, we feel the presence and experience the imprint of our life upon this world.

 

Nature reminds us to return to ourselves. To take good care of our state of being so that when we are filled up we can give from our fullness. Then when we go out into the world we can stay long enough to gaze into the eyes of another without having any agenda at all. Just to receive another and listen and hold them for that precious holy moment is sacred. We can't do it if we are continuing to run around and be distracted with saving the world or thinking in any way that we could fix it.

 

We are here to learn self-love. In receiving every part of our humanity, all the darkness and the lightness, we can stop judging and begin allowing life in.

 

In the middle of the night I woke up to feel Charlotte's presence, brilliantly shining in my room. She was so free and happy. My heart filled up with her spirit.

 

My friend Charlotte has been reborn into her fullness and as Spirit she sees how loved she is.

Her love shines through her imprint that was left on our hearts. She gave to this world selflessly. Now she is in the arms of her God and her darling daughter.

 

In the morning I decided to go to a restorative yoga class a block away. I call Cindy at Island Yoga Space and ask her if there is room. With a yes, I walk down the street with my yoga mat on my shoulder. Looking up at the clear blue sky I hear Charlotte's words that are echoing in my heart, " I am finally learning to receive."

I am finally learning to receive.

 

There is a balance between giving and receiving. Nature receives until it is so full then it bursts into giving us the fragrance and beauty of its presence.

 

It's springtime and Easter. A time of renewal and rebirth. A time to let go and breathe into all that I am.

This life is precious. I can open up and let myself take baby steps into the next moment. With this conscious nurturing, I can... we can flower in an instant.

 

Now open and bloom!

All my love

Namasté,

Frannie

Under the Tuscan Sky

"Recognize the tremendous courage you show every moment of every day, with each breath, you reaffirm your decision to embrace and learn from your own challenges. Within that recognition, you will find your soul." -Your Soul's Plan by Robert Schwartz

This journey we are on is about love. We are here to learn to love ourselves and others. It's hard when we are deep in grief or fear has us paralyzed in its grip or when we think we can't possibly try again. Maybe then, we can let out a sigh that helps us let go of what is and inhale and try once again.  If we  accept life as it is, we might see the energy that is weaving us all together like one beautiful tapestry. Allowing it all to be without judgment helps us to see our life lessons that can be less painful when we breathe deeply into this presence that lives through us and around us in every moment of our living. When we meet the outer world with our inner world, our heart prevents us from collapsing and we are very much in control of what we can be. We learn to be more resilient as the pain of life moves through us.

Being in Italy is truly a romantic backdrop for falling in love. It's definitely a place to find yourself in the arms of beauty that exists all around. The sculptures, the paintings, the cobble stone streets, the ruins that are around every corner, especially in Rome, captivates you. Everywhere I look, I am in awe of the massive buildings, the cypress and umbrella trees. It's busy with cars and people from all nations as one gets caught up in being a tourist. So much to see and take in as I walk the streets or drive through the countryside.  It's all magical and in some ways it feels surreal. It's like stepping into another world, so different than the one I am used to living in.

As I sit under the arbor, overlooking the valley, here at the Villa Stefano in Tuscany, I enter inside with my breath as the beauty of the outside brings me to a sigh. It's the comfort of fully being here within myself as I take in the peace that nature gives so freely. In this silence within me, my senses heighten and the sweet music of the birds, the sounds of insects flying near as the breeze wraps itself around me, I drop into the familiar place of connection. It doesn't matter where I am, I come inward so that the awareness of all that is,  gives me that feeling like no other. It's like meeting an old friend, where there is no distance or time when we live in the heart. It's just comfortable to be right here amidst this world that spins around with so much information and movement. I feel like being still is like winning a most treasured gift. It's not like I am running away from life, I just come inside to find that sweet spot where the divine meets my humanity. It's always there waiting for my return and when I do take reprieve from my busy world, I am rewarded. I feel I see the world with a deeper connection and I love more deeply. I would say that mindfully I have chosen to live from the inside out and then this world becomes my constant companion and there is less struggle because I realize everything is perfectly unfolding.

artwork by Frannie

A week ago, just starting off my vacation in Tuscany at the Villa where my boyfriend Robert brings tours to experience living in Italy, I fell down the stairs and sprained my foot. Off to the doctors to get X-rays and a walking cast. This was definitely not in my plan. There was no time to feel sorry for myself because obviously the moment before my fall, I wasn't as present as I could have been and how grateful I was it wasn't worse. It happens so quickly and life as we know it changes.

So for a year you think about this month long retreat away and all of your imaginings truly can't ever do it justice. It's just beautiful arriving here and walking or limping for me on the ancient roads and seeing the cathedrals and museums of exquisite art. Everywhere you walk is a picture worthy of taking and the food is such a big part of the experience of Italy. Robert is the ultimate host and all of his planning comes together so naturally  as each person begins to make their home this villa. Nothing to do but enjoy being taken care of as drivers and guides take you on the tours and when you arrive back to your villa home, a 5 to 7 course meal awaits. Robert has a young chef, Alessia,who is from the area and cooks all of the recipes from all around Italy and with Roberts passion of cooking, the food is nothing less then perfect. Every course is like going into the best restaurant and what is so great is the love that is poured into every dish. You learn about the history of these dishes and sitting under the stars and moon we enjoy conversation, food and delicious wines around the table where friendships grow deeper. Maria and her daughter Diana serve and clean up and there is nothing you need to do but receive the relaxation of this beautiful place.

So, I am reminded again, that it is not the experiences that form us but it is the way we respond to it. As I sit in this stillness of a beautiful afternoon, I see with a greater awareness that when I don't push against what is, there is a freedom to experience what is here. There is no distractions as I allow myself the luxury to sit on the patio and feel the exquisite beauty of being right here inside myself. After letting go of my disappointment that I could not go on the walking tour with my friends, I was here, in this magnificent experience that brought me into the stillness that for me is heaven on earth. I was so happy to know that my friends were enjoying Sienna and shopping in Florence and viewing the David at the Academia. The joy was right here making a way for me to let go a little more of my plans and trust that healing was happening because I did not stay stuck in the loss. Yes, even when you fall and you can't walk, you grieve a little because we have such expectations with our thought out plans. I know Robert had thoughts of me  walking down to the river or climbing up the hills through the vineyards. Yet, to realize that this moment is all you have, you can create a deeper union with spirit and let your eyes open wide and appreciate all that is existing. I take in a breath of fresh air and watch the breeze move through the olive trees as the sun warms my heart. Getting lost in the moment, I look up at the clear blue sky.

As a writer and an artist, it is the stillness that becomes my workplace. This is where I take in the world and all of it's impressions and when I sit still and come inward, the words or brush strokes, express the feelings and thoughts of what life has brought me. I love to share it in this way and how beautiful it is to put an experience onto a clear canvas or even my tablet. I just get fed, just like eating all the delicious food that has been put on my plate.

Seeing all of the paintings of the Renaissance time or sculptures of the masters, I am inspired just with my eyes as I observe it all and it brings an energy that weaves it all together. I can feel inspired to draw or paint even though my skills are so simple, I can look at these masterpieces and be taken into a world of creation and get lost in the silent mind that just receives its beauty. Sitting inside this quiet place I sigh with relief that even if I do nothing but receive this moment, I can be renewed and full of life once again.

So whether I travel to far away places or just happen to pull myself away from all of the distractions like cell phones, YouTube, Facebook, and emails, I can journey inside to a inner landscape and be brave enough to allow myself to face the inner parts hidden underneath all of those questions and ideas. I can welcome it all until  I am unveiled and nothing keeps me from the joy of being right here. The voices become quiet and the body softens and my heart expands to love this world a little more. This amplifies the experience of life as I walk with or without crutches to bring the calm into this ordinary world filled with commotion.

I look out over the valley and the same sky that hours ago brought me here, looks even brighter.

Ciao Bella,

Frannie

The Pilgrimage is Life

"Let yourself be silently drawn by the stronger pull of what you really love. The wound is the place where the Light enters you. Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it." Rumi

I walk down the dock this early morning, silently drawn by the hand of my own spirit. I have walked here countless times before where I know that nature, always the same, holds me no matter what I bring from within. It seems that the painful moments of yesterday's were just passageways to more life. Loss has truly been a constant companion and now I am understanding more deeply that the letting go of what was and the allowing of what is becomes the doorway to love.

Two swans sit in front of me. It is such a peaceful moment in time as the warmth of this summer morning brings me home to myself. I am so grateful for this beautiful cottage that holds for me the memories of a life of growing up through all of the challenges that come with this journey.

The sun rises up behind me as it shines its light upon the rippling water. It is so clear I can see the sea weed right to the bottom. I remember, as a child, diving off the dock into the water as the grass brushed up against my skin. I remember when I first opened my eyes under the surface as I glided through and the vision of underwater life thrilled me. Again and again I would climb back onto the dock until I was shivering and my lips were blue. I just wanted to experience it one more time.

The wonder of a child who sees this world with eyes that hold no judgement. When did it all change? How easy it is to just see this world with eyes of the past, projecting that which sees with limitation or scaring the moment with critical voices.

So it is, each time I enter this dock, memories pass by my mind yet I never get tired of the beauty held in these precious moments. Many a time I have sat here to meditate and begin the day, knowing within my breath that I will be nurtured by every sound and gaze. It is where my heart knows that even through the ages of time, deep inside I am still that one that dove into the water 50 or more years ago. My body has changed yet the same joy of being alive is filling me up and my presence is familiar. Nothing distracting me away from the moment where I know who I am.

This pilgrimage through life has made me the person I am yet the spirit of me is unchanging. Maybe I am more awake for sure yet there is a familiar part of me that continues to observe this life as it is. This observer is the witness never changing, just being. I see with an open heart as the fish jump, the birds fly overhead, the swans glide over the rippling waters and the trees stand at attention like a picture frame. I hear the cars in the distance as they move across the gravel road and sounds of cottagers waking up making breakfast as the smell of bacon and coffee moves through the breeze. The cows moo and the crows caw and the music of the water underneath the dock cradles me like a lullaby. The sunlight touches the back of my head as it peeks over me. I look into the blue sky as clouds are painted with brush strokes by a quiet creator. This beautiful painting gives me life and I am inspired to receive it deeply with every breath I take.

Yes, this is home, built by my parents and left for us to enjoy with our children and our children's children. The joy of our family life has continued through the ebb and flow of this journey through the ages and because the falseness has fallen away and the barriers have softened, I come here more alive then ever before because I let life fully in. There is nothing that has separated me from this union where my spirit loved ones join me this day. I am so grateful as I feel the presence of my mother and father and my husband Steve, as I invite it all in.

Happy Birthday to you mom today. You would be 90 years old. I bow to you for I was born through your womb and your pilgrimage has brought me to mine. I continue to walk on and with all the gifts that life has brought me, I am connected to a power that creates worlds as I trust in this life that is unfolding.

We are all on a pilgrimage. A sacred journey where we unveil through our own self imposed barriers and let the walls crumble as the light enters, shining on the path that continues to be life giving. We walk on as we become the one that hears the calling, sharing love in our way through the gifts of being ourselves. As I hear the voice of spirit speak, I receive her message - On this day of birth, you are more because I am more with you.

As this pull from within has drawn me to the end of the dock this morning, I know that my spirit loved ones are here - my heart tells me so!

Namaste,

Frannie

Be the Light of the World

Tis the season!

A time of sharing and celebrating the birth of Christ. I grew up in a Catholic household and yet through the years I have found my way inward to create a peaceful time through the holiday season. It is beyond the dogma of religion. It is a season to share our hearts with our families, friends and community. It is another day to remember that peace abides within a grateful heart and sometimes our longing is just a breath away. We can choose to drop into this moment of a holiday season and just breathe in this precious life that we have and get out of the way so that we can be used to bring some light into the world.

It's not always the happiest days when we think of the loved ones that have transitioned or live far away and are not here to sit at our table on Christmas day. Life has brought opportunities to help me to shift into what is the gift that is most natural to give. I love to give in the spirit of self -expression. To share food, conversation, appreciation or just listening to those that are placed before me. We can hold the hand of the one that sits beside us and just be love. Why isn't it always that easy? Why do we ever for an instant stop ourselves from expressing who we truly are? Why is life so hard sometimes and we wait for someone to give us permission to just let go and let God? 

  

I walk down the beach on this glorious day, the sun is shining in the brilliant blue sky as I reach down and pick up a shell. I look at it as if it were a gift from the heavens. I gaze up at the sky and I speak out loud to my spirit loved ones. I speak to them as if they were walking beside me and then I listen with a silent and open heart. Sometimes I just hear myself talking. Today, the waves of energy flow up and down my spine and tears roll down my face as a sweet energy fills my heart. It is such a mystery as I watch the sun setting and the brilliant sky lights up in every shade of orange. This masterpiece created by this divine force begins to speak a language heard only within my heart. I am filled with love once again.

  

Nature is my teacher and reminder of who I truly can be. I have wept before the sunrise and sunset so many times. I have raged and screamed my hurt and pain a thousand times when I have forgotten to breathe or disconnected from my source. The world has brought me face to face with myself and humbly I bow to nature as the earth grounds me into what is real. I let go so that I can sit at the smorgasbord of this table of life. It is filled with so much food and I can taste the nectar that nourishes my heart. I walk back home.

The season is preparing me to empty so that I can be filled with more peace. I enter my front door and begin to take out the boxes that are stored in the laundry room.

  

This ritual I have as I take out the Christmas ornaments, one by one, brings memories through many years of my life. My heart feels it all and breath by breath I am humbled by the presence of spirit that gives to me through these moments where my story continues to unfold. Right here in my living room as Christmas music plays, I wrap my tree with the strands of lights of every color. Then I turn on the switch and the darkened room is filled with light. I open myself with the awe that filled me for the first time when I was a child. This incredible feeling of wonder as if I was just born.

  

These lights are twinkling before me. I sit on the couch and breathe it all in. I can be the light in the world and so can you. We can be used as an instrument for peace to touch the world through our living.

I savor the gift of presence as I open each day as if it were a present!

Happy Holidays to all!

All my love,

Frannie

Live, Love and Laugh!

When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change."

- Wayne Dyer

Being in Italy again is more than I ever imagined. I was 17  years old when I walked down the cobble stone roads before with my best girl friends, Debbie, Virginia and Christina. Now I am appreciating the experience with the wisdom of what life has brought me. I am taking in the moments with all of my senses, inspired by this new environment. One of my favorite teachers and authors, Wayne Dyer, has just transitioned recently. Countless times he would sit at his writing desk with pictures of Saints and Guru's surrounding him.  He would share with us that he could call on their energy and channel the words written for us all to receive the gift of presence in each word that flowed out of him. 

I felt the same way as I walked into the Academia Gallery in Florence that houses Michelangelo's David and his Prisoners and many works from the 16th-18th century. The energy  vibrated through me as if I was plugged into a light socket. I felt like I could cry, emotions filled me with a joy that was expanding my heart. My eyes drank in these works of art as huge sculptures of marble, like giants, carved so long ago were right before me. Seeing the forms of strong, naked prisoners stepping out of the marble as if they were unfinished pieces of art. The freeing of the form out of the formless as these marble figures seem to come alive. As I looked down to the great hall, the statue of David pulled me closer to take in the history of this sculpted masterpiece. The tremendous surge of energy came in waves as I recall the words Wayne Dyer used to tell us, " to be inspired is to be in-spirit".  I felt myself in this timeless moment sharing this love I have for art and allowing the inspiration to move me into more of myself. Then to make the whole experience even richer, I am holding the hand of my new love, Robert,  who gets it. He knows that I am filled with the emotions of being surrounded by the energy of all of these masters who seem to be crowding the room. The room is wall to wall people and maybe most are unaware of the magnitude of energy that is filling us all, feeding us with so much more than we could conceive of. 
I am intoxicated with a love that is beyond this human experience and every part of me wants to dance, sing, paint, hug and kiss...I am inspired and filled with the joy of being alive. It doesn't get better than this! I am in love and meeting all parts of myself that wants to be free just like the sculptures of Michelangelo. I am making a choice to free myself out of the mold of this human form that I am. I get lost in the paintings as I move through the various rooms and time seems to be stands still and nothing seems to pull me away from the incredible feeling of just being here right now. I look away from the statue of David and meet the gaze of Robert as I see him taking me in and sharing in the love of being in this magnificent place together.

With love,

Frannie

Ciao!

Spring Forward

Happy Spring Everyone! The clocks now are set forward an hour and we get to have longer days of light! I love springtime evenings after a few months of winter, where darkness comes upon us too early. Without those sunny, warm days keeping us busy outside, we are moved inside to hibernate and withdraw. Even here in Florida we have our seasons. Nothing compares to the deep freeze around the globe.   I remember springtime in Ontario when I was a little girl. The sidewalks would clear of snow and you could smell the earth defrosting. It was fun to put on knee socks and finally get out of tights and leotards. I loved keeping my jacket open, no gloves or hats, skipping to school as the sun seemed to shine brighter. I felt so free and that feeling is always right inside of me when I am present with it all. Springtime is here! Come join me at one of the Circle of Light meditations and together let us move forward into the richness of new life and promise that blossoms into adventure and infinite possibility.   Have a blessed day! Frannie

As I walk through the restaurant, memories pour through me. I look at the table that Steve and I sat at each time we stepped into this place. It feels surreal. I walk past that empty table and for a moment I see him sitting there. I am transported into a moment where the spirit world is right here and no veil separates us. I walk through the hallway and look at the familiar pictures on the walls. My human eyes gaze outward yet I am focused inside where I am filled with feelings. I looked at these pictures so many times before but today I get closer and the details move me deeper. When I am present with myself, I feel the inner landscape. The internal world, filled with so much of my personal history, also holds the mystery of spirit. As painful as these moments can be, I am filled and enriched with more expression and truth as I awaken a little more to who I am. These familiar places can be a distraction, but when I consciously breathe and am still within, they provide connection to more life that is present in every moment. Being present moves me closer to that which joins and allows union. I see the world as another opportunity to share in this expression of unity consciousness. Step-by-step, as we walk in our ordinary worlds awake and conscious, we slip into a vast inner world that knows everything and nothing at the same time. We open up to every so called problem and allow our hearts to call on spirit to show us the way to what is true. Joined here within the heart of the one that creates anew, we become illuminated with the light that sees all as one moment in time. We are free to choose life or simply choose love. It's not always easy to find our way back to our own hearts. We like to travel away into the busy life of distraction and doing. Yet no matter how long or how far we stray, returning home to the present moment is only a breath away. From this place of connection we can spring forward into the next moment instead of staying stuck in a past that does not serve us any longer. The moment brings memories and yet now it helps you heal and remember what is real. Love prevails and the miracle is seen as the eyes are open again and what is seen heals everything that has been. The art of stillness brings the truth out into the open. The artist begins to paint a new picture. The singer sings a new song. And through the writer words again flow. The woman finds her purpose. A man becomes devoted to his true self. We awaken and now we consciously chop wood and carry water. Everything is alive and flowing again. Blessed Be